7:30 a.m.
Fuck. Up too late drinking Hamms and compiling "White Sands Beer Cans." Tired, and barely hung over. Whatever — how much sleep do you need to hang in the desert?
8:10 a.m.
No laundry left. I should stay home...and get something done for once. Like the fucking laundry. Maybe wash a dish or something. Why am I so tired?
This beard is getting ridiculous.
It would be cool to own a dog.
Throw my bag in the car. Drive to Lou and Sarah's.
9 a.m.
On the road. Sort of. Drove for three minutes and stopped at the old Taco Bell. Ordering a Country Burrito. Just realized I haven't eaten since yesterday's lunch. No reason. "Green sauce" on an empty stomach.
10 a.m.
Stop for coffee and a bottle of water. Collin is pissing off the dog.
Back on the road.
"I walked 47 miles of barbed wire. Use a cobra snake for a neck tie. Well I got me a house on the road side, made out of rattle snake hide. I got me a chimney made on top, made out of human skull."
12 p.m.
Off the interstate, onto the highway. Everything everywhere looks abandoned. Cows all over the place. Southern New Mexico. Maaaaaannn.
Sign: "Trinity Site: The nuclear age began with the detonation of the world's first atomic bomb at the Trinity Site on July 16, 1943. The site may have been named Trinity by Robert Oppenheimer, director of the Los Alamos National Laboratory, who said at the blast, "Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds," quoting from the Bhagavad Gita."
Now I am become Death.
12:15 p.m.
Guards and cops at the Trinity Site. No entry. Something up on the hill looks like a Bucky dome.
1:30 p.m.
Please pay $2 to see the petraglyphs. No thanks. I'll just walk past your sign for free.
Some Texan woman is screaming at a bunch of first graders to shut up while she talks a bunch of bullshit about Indians. Failure.
What is a petraglyph? Am I to believe the drawing of a man with a fluffy moustache was done by Native Americans centuries ago? What about the anarchy symbol? "Petraglyphs are so postmodern." I agree, Lou.
3 p.m.
Here we are. It only took a couple Crushers, but we made it. White Sands National Monument.
Brochure: the unique component of the sand is gypsum, which is water soluble. Two hundred fifty million years ago this was all a lake. There are white lizards here.
Shit is weird. Seriously, what is this? It looks like hills of snow forever. I'm on a different planet.
3:20 p.m.
Left our shoes at the car. Filled the backpack with Bud Light and a Crusher. Off into the wild.
3:45 p.m.
Can only see sand...and mountains in the distance. The sun is a little warm. It's somehow unsettling to be this far from shade.
Oh my god. You can jump down these hills. Just run....and jump. Into the sand. This should be so uncomfortable, but it's perfect.
4:15 p.m.
Laying on a dune, finishing a Crusher. Covering my face with my shirt. Don't wanna sunburn.
The dog is eating sand. And he's drinking water from a beer can.
4:45 p.m.
Thoughtful discussion.
"Twenty-Five Pounds of Cocaine Shoved Up a Dog's Ass: How Phallic Burritos and a Startling Critique of Georgia O'Keefe Revolutionized Norteño Art."
5:30 p.m.
Jumping down the biggest hill we can find. Writing a 75-foot message (PARTY) below.
6:15 p.m.
Out of water and beer. Time to leave. Final message: ALIEN BOOM! PARTY
The dog leads the way. Only gets us half-lost once.
8 p.m.
Las Cruces is a 10-mile long Wal-Mart. Lots of stuff, but nothing.
It costs $80 to stay at the Best Western. Lou and Sarah are banned from the other hotel... What to do?
8:30 p.m.
No cover at Graham Central Station. Drinking $1.50 beers and watching bar employees sing karaoke to "Creep." Stupid.
9:15 p.m.
More beers. Signed up to sing Johnny Cash. No one is here. Where are we going to stay?
10 p.m.
Assholes at the bar crossed off the song. Oh well.
Gas station food and a long drive home. Why are we leaving?
Eating chips in the back. Lou drives. Who's got the oil can?
10:15 p.m.
Yes, officer, we're all citizens.
3 a.m.
How long have I been sleeping? Yeah, Ok, let's get the hell back home.
I need a quesadilla.
3:30 a.m.
I should have cleaned this pan before cooking this quesadilla. I should have done my laundry.
There is sand in my ears, hair, pockets, wallet and cell phone. It is time to sleep for years.
